


your name, forever the name on my lips

by leehyukjae



Category: Super Junior
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Moving Out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-29
Updated: 2020-09-29
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:21:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26714383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leehyukjae/pseuds/leehyukjae
Summary: ‘Jongwoon & Ryeowook, 2015 ‒ we’re home’It was like nothing had changed, but somehow, everything has changed.
Relationships: Kim Jongwoon | Yesung/Kim Ryeowook
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	your name, forever the name on my lips

**Author's Note:**

> based on tswift's all too well (title from tswift's last kiss)

Stacks of boxes spread all around the room, each filled with memories and reminders of pasts to misrecollect and futures to come. A gust of wind blew from the window, sweeping in a photograph that fell upon his feet. He picks it up, dusts it off, the image becoming clear once more.

In the photo stood two individuals, one leaning against the other, and one with his arms slung across the other’s shoulder. Both were smiling at the camera. Behind them was a house, fairly old with branches of a tree nearby blocking most of the house’s facade. The leaves on the tree, brown and crumbling.

But it was ours, he thought. It was theirs and they were more than happy. He looked outside, it was like nothing had changed. The branches still blocked most of the view, the leaves falling off one by one. It was autumn, just like in the photograph. 

He looks across the room, from the boxes to the emptied out space. He could picture the moments they had in each corner, from the midnight rendezvous to the early morning coffee talks. Five years. Five years of pure joy, occasional tears, wallowed fears, and unspoken regrets. The house was much older, yet it wasn’t theirs anymore. 

He turns the worn-out photography around. The ink was almost fading but he can still clearly read what was written on the back.

‘Jongwoon & Ryeowook, 2015 ‒ we’re home’

It was like nothing had changed, but somehow, everything has changed.

Putting the photo aside, he continued to pack what was left: books, cutlery, sheets, clothes. It was a new chapter of their lives, he wouldn’t have wanted to put it on hold. He remembers how the other was always impatient and wanted to get things done quickly, unlike him who likes to pause and let the moment sink in.

A minute elapsed before the door opened, revealing the other man in the photo. Fate must have wanted to play a joke because standing by the door, shaking out the stray leaves in his hair, was Ryeowook. Kim Ryeowook, wearing the same white sweater Jongwoon himself wore in the photo.

* * *

_“Jongwoon, I swear if I trip, I’m going to feed you to the birds!”_

_He laughed, the sound echoing with the crunch of the fallen leaves as they both took a step closer to their destination. Jongwoon has his hands covering Ryeowook’s eyes, excitement building up within him. A few more steps and they were closer to their dreams. A few more steps and they were closer to their future._

_Jongwoon stopped in front of their dream house. It was their first ever investment being together. He would be lying when he said there weren’t any losses or risks taken. He had to work three jobs a week and Ryeowook had to sell most of his books just to pitch in. The house was a bit old, but it was what they could afford. What matters is how we make it into our home, he remembers Ryeowook saying._

_He took off his hands from Ryeowook’s eyes and the genuine happiness from the other’s reaction was enough for him to live. The autumn breeze swept their hair up, it made him a bit cold but it had nothing against the warmth of Ryeowook’s love._

_Wanting to have a tangible memory, Jongwoon took his film camera from his bag and asked a passerby if they could take a picture for them. Ryeowook fixed Jongwoon’s white sweater, adjusting the collar of the white shirt he wore underneath while Jongwoon set down his bag on the pavement._

_As Ryeowook leans against him, somehow he felt secured. The future was still unclear for the both of them but he promises to make it their best years. What they have wasn’t just a house, it was their home._

* * *

“Finished packing?”

Jongwoon shakes his head. There was still a lot to pack but truthfully, he didn’t want to finish quickly. He wanted to take all the time in the world because he didn’t want to leave just yet.

“I’m so sorry I’m late. The meeting was so hectic, I had to bitch at everyone just to shut them up.”

Ryeowook always had a bad temper around other people, he knows that. And what Jongwoon knows better was that Ryeowook never seemed to have it when he was around. He smiles at the thought.

“You know, you didn’t have to help me with this. I could have done it on my own,” Ryeowook says.

“I know you could,” Jongwoon replies, continuing to put Ryeowook’s books inside a box. “I just wanted one last look inside the house before we go.”

The smaller man nods, stepping closer where Jongwoon was. He picks up a stack of books from the counter, wanting to store it inside, when something fell at the ground by his feet.

Crouching down, Ryeowook picks up what appeared to be a photograph. ‘Jongwoon & Ryeowook, 2015 ‒ we’re home’ was written on the back and he didn’t have to turn it around to know what image was on the other side.

* * *

Setting the last box inside Ryeowook’s car, Jongwoon turned around to meet the other man’s gaze. “Was that everything?”

The moon shines brightly as it reflects on Ryeowook’s eyes. A thought flashes in Jongwoon’s mind, reminding him of when they danced around their home in the darkness with only the moon providing light. A few sweet, fleeting touches and innocent, quick kisses here and there as they twirled around.

“Yeah, I already have my things at my parents’ house,” he replies, mouth running dry.

Ryeowook steps closer and Jongwoon feels his heart almost leaping out his chest. The other takes his hand without saying a word. A second passes, a minute, before Ryeowook kisses him on the cheek.

He looks up, and it was only then that he notices Ryeowook had changed his clothes. He was wearing a brown cardigan, the white sweater Jongwoon originally owned nowhere in sight.

“I think…” Ryeowook drawls off, his hands fidgeting with the strap of his bag. “I think I have enough memories of us already, Jongwoon.”

Jongwoon wanted to say he was okay. He wanted to remember that day as a good one. He never thought hearing his name leave Ryeowook’s lips would hurt him. But it did. It hurt him enough to bring tears to his eyes. He wasn’t fine at all.

Ryeowook reaches into his bag, a white sweater emerging from it. He hands it to Jongwoon who only stared at it before smiling at Ryeowook.

“No, keep it. It’s yours now,” he says, hiding the pain. “Something to remind you of me.”

“A-are you sure?”

“Think of it as a gift from me…” Jongwoon nods once more, smiling. “... as a friend.”

He knows Ryeowook was itching to say something more, to explain something that should be left unexplained. But he also knows that one more word from Ryeowook and his heart would break. Even more than it was now.

“You should go now, Ryeowook. It’s getting dark,” he insists.

With nothing left to do, Ryeowook nods and gets into his car. He starts the engine, but rolls open the window. He looks at Jongwoon once more before reaching into his bag and pulling out something from it. 

“Remember me too, Jongwoon. Remember me as a friend,” Ryeowook says as Jongwoon takes the object from Ryeowook’s hand.

Before Jongwoon even had the chance to say goodbye, Ryeowook set off into the night. Away from their home. Away from Jongwoon.

As the car disappears into the distance, Jongwoon looks at what Ryeowook gave him.

It was their photo, the one that Jongwoon picked up earlier. It was their photo from five years ago.

With all memories with Ryeowook crashing down on him, Jongwoon breaks down. He didn’t know what went wrong and what happened for them to grow apart, but he knows deep inside that he still truly loves Ryeowook. Somewhere along the way, they got lost and it all started to crumble.

The autumn breeze seems even colder even when he was wearing a coat. The warmth he felt was gone, it was all just cold.

Jongwoon takes one last gaze at their home, but he couldn’t really call it home anymore. 

So Jongwoon walks, wind blowing his hair.

He walks home _alone._

__

**Author's Note:**

> this is a product of me having a million essays to write but choosing to write this first <3
> 
> also don't they look like an actual couple in that photo?? uGH
> 
> first try for yewook pls don't hate me for it >__<
> 
> [edit] ryeowook confirmed his relationship seconds after i posted this oneshot ;—; i’m so happy for him uwu


End file.
